A classmate and midnight chat buddy asked me the other day for advice on writing a paper the night before the deadline, which I was pleased to offer, having done this once or twice. Or, you know, my entire first two years of college. Now, we all know this is a crap idea and that you really shouldn't do it...but sometimes you do. And here's how I'd make the best of it:
1) Take a little time to prepare. In my experience, you probably have notes and outlines already, because this is about the fact that you suffer from crippling self-doubt, not the fact that you're a slacker. In that case, take a few minutes to refresh your memory and make a plan for the paper. At this point, you don't have much time for revision, so it's all about choosing a structure and sticking to it.
2) And then start writing. The one good thing about last-minute writing is that it removes all options. It's too late for procrastination. Damn the torpedos, full speed ahead.
3) After an hour, get up and walk around the block/library/house. Do not skip this--it is what keeps your mind sharp and prevents you from going off the rails with one of those last-minute ideas that sounds great at 3am but is actually batshit crazy.
4) Take care of your body. I know this is counterintuitive when you're spending all night in front of a glowy screen, but there are some rules that will keep you going strong. Eat lots of high-protein snacks. Sugar is good, but only if you have a constant supply, or you'll crash. Caffeine is your friend, but go slow. If you up your intake too much, you'll probably lose your ability to focus, and might feel sick. Food without coffee is doable, coffee without food is a disaster. Drink plenty of water. Having to pee will keep you awake.
5) When you feel like you will never get it done and you're starting to doze, put on really loud sing-along music and do your bibliography. Print it out and feel successful.
6) If you're almost done in the wee hours of the morning, stop before the conclusion and take a quick nap. Yes, you will feel like crap when you wake up, but that's why God invented the caramel latte and lox spread. Leaving yourself the conclusion for tomorrow forces you to read through the paper, gives your fresh brain a chance to squeeze in a little more smart, and helps you catch the batshit crazy that may have snuck in, despite your best efforts.
7) Don't waste time beating yourself up about procrastinating. It is now too late. Channel Leo McGarry of The West Wing- "Get it done."
8) Tomorrow, after you've turned it in, when you suddenly feel like crying and quitting school? Go to bed. Even if it's noon.
Next time, useful (not just preachy!) tips on how to avoid this situation.
With love,
Your correspondent.
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